You Do Know How to Eat - Sort Of

I felt like, "People don't know how to eat" might have been a little too broad-sweeping. Obviously, you know how to eat - you've been doing it for years and there are people out there who have dialed in and nailed down a way of eating that helps them feel their best, bring them joy, or that works for them outside of either of those two things. But some of the statements I hear or read make me think that others are still struggling.

Things like, 

"My co-worker just started a 500 calorie diet."

"I'm not working out or eating well, and my body is starting to hurt."

"I really want a cookie. But I know I can't have one - help!"

"I ate pizza today instead of a salad. I failed."

"When I exercise I am always starving and I need to try and curb that hunger."

Misconceptions about health and fitness abound! And it bothers me to know that depression, anxiety, poor sleep, mood disorders, hormone and fertility issues, and more are directly affected by what we eat. Instead of looking to our diets, we too often treat those things with prescription or over-the-counter drugs or go on restrictive and otherwise unbalanced diets to achieve better health. (And not that medicine does not have it's place - it certainly does.) But what I want is to crack the door open on another resource - your FOOD! There's a better way!

Thankfully you don't have to have a degree in Nutrition to figure it all out. Your body and how it reacts to what you eat provide an excellent road map if you'll stop to take a look - and listen. Ask yourself these questions:

  • Am I at a healthy weight for my body, height, frame?

  • Do I have joint aches and pains on a consistent basis?

  • Do I feel energized after eating, or tired?

  • Am I happy with my current health and body?

  • Am I sleeping well?

  • Do I need caffeine to stay awake and alert throughout the day and sleeping pills to go to sleep?

  • Is my digestion regular? 

  • Have I given up on the thought that my body could function at an ideal level and that food could make me feel GOOD?

  • Do I believe that to achieve health, I have to eat perfectly or give up anything fun, sweet, or yummy-tasting?

What's your score? =) JK. It's not a test. But your answers to the questions above are telling. And will start to give you a look inside as to how your body functions and the state of your health.

I'm excited to dive into and begin to talk about the things I've learned over the past several years and some key changes to my health and diet that have made a huge difference in my day to day life and well-being. I hope you'll come along!

 

 

 


 

 

February 1st and Some Writing Stuff

Hi! It's me.

I don't even know how to start this thing. The longer you go without doing something, the harder and more awkward it is to start. As the new year approached, I promised myself I was going to start writing more and growing my blog. It made my "More Of" list which was basically a brain-dump of things I wanted more of in my life in 2017. <the baby's crying and I just looked at her and said, "How am I supposed to do this? This is why I don't write."> But I know that's just an excuse. We make time for the things in life that are important to us and we find time when we decide the time is going to be there. For real though, I'm going to have to go lay her down. brb.

No nap. Just applesauce.

As I was saying...at some point I have to stop talking about writing and actually write. I loved this by Jon Acuff in his book START,

"I was scared to write a book. Talking about it was easier and safer than trying it and possibly finding out that I didn't have what it takes. I had clutched apathy like a shield to my chest for years, pretending I didn't really care about writing a book. I was also lazy."

I won't say that I've been completely lazy as I do have a thirteen month old who I carried around for nine months, birthed and then waded through a postpartum haze with but I have been scared. And yes, some pretending that writing isn't a deep-seeded passion of mine that I enjoy. Or that I think I'm half-way good at. Or that I long to use as a vehicle to help other people. Mostly I just think about it a lot.

Oh, man, I should write about that!

Seriously, that would make a great topic.

One day I'll write...and then I don't. Instead I check social media for the umpteenth which is getting you and I both no closer to our goals or health. But it is more fun! And feels less scary.

Yesterday I had the pleasure of talking to one of my favorite girlfriends. She told me I could I be her "food therapist" because our topic often turns to food, and healthy life and how do we do it? I said, "That's what my blog will be! Food Therapy!" And I admit one of the things that keeps me from writing is not knowing how it will all turn out or what it should look like. Health Blog? Lifestyle? Just food? Family anecdotes and cute stories about my girls? Do I need to come up with all my material and post it all at once? It needs to be perfect, right?! But I don't KNOW it all so can I even do this? <That's what it sounds like in my brain.>

Referencing my good buddy Jon again, I don't need to worry about all that. I just need to start. I need to find thirty minutes and write. That's it. Don't worry about what it's all going to look like or where it might lead, just start and the path will reveal itself.

My passion is food. And nutrition. And the recurring thought I have that sounds condescending but really isn't is this:

People don't know how to eat.

They don't know what they should be eating, how they should be eating, or how to achieve a healthy weight. They give up on day 3 of whatever current diet they're on because it's all too exhausting and complicated and I'll just go back to doing whatever it is I was doing that has me no closer to a healthy, fulfilling life. A life in which food plays a fun and non-stressful role and that doesn't require me thinking about it 24/7 to look good or feel good. They don't know how to eat for life.

And I want to help with that. 

At the risk of sounding like a know-it-all, believe me, I don't. There are a lot of things I'm not very good at. I used to be neat and organized; now my house is often a mess. (I'm getting better!) Decorating is not my forte. Neither are little girl hairstyles. But food, I kind of get. And I continue to learn more every day. I'm passionate about helping YOU understand that what you EAT every day affects you more than you realize! And it's possible to use food as your ally and see it less as an enemy. Can we do that together?

I need you to ask me when you see me, "Are you writing?" Because clearly I need some accountability. Or - you can always comment on a blog post and say, "Keep it up!" That works too. :> And if you care nothing about food or learning how to eat, I'll be sure to throw stories about the girls in as well. 

It's February 1st! The month of lovvve. Go love yourself.

Eat breakfast.

Nursing the First Year

As we approach Krosby's first birthday I wanted to take some time and write about our nursing journey and what it has meant to me as her mama. I know everyone's story is different, not every mom wants or chooses to breastfeed and some are not able to. But for me it is something that has been extremely special and meaningful and that I feel has such big payoff!

As with all things motherhood, varying thoughts and opinions on the subject abound but here are some of the reasons I chose to not only start but stick with it.

{I want to give a disclaimer of sorts ahead of time. :> If you didn't or couldn't b-feed for any number of reasons, let's still be friends! I don't think you're a bad or weird person. I think you're a GREAT mama. You did what you felt was best for you and your baby. I don't want to spend an entire blog post couching each statement with "but it's ok if you didn't!" These are my reasons, my story and my hope is to perhaps educate, inspire, and/or simply relate the part that it has played in our lives. We're individuals with unique life experiences! If my story or opinions are different than yours, it's OK.}

1. It felt natural. Breastfeeding is part of God's design! Biologically, our bodies are designed to nurse babies and wouldn't you know it, when the baby is born you body goes to work to prepare sustenance for this new little life. Amazing sustenance that is specially formulated to be the right proportion of immune-boosting nutrients, the perfect temperature and a comfort for their sudden exposure to the outside world.

2. It's less work, eventually. Breastfeeding is not easy, until it is. It's hard at first! There are many challenges, especially as a first time mama that make you want to give up. Soreness, trouble latching, baby falling asleep, just getting the hang of it, mastitis, clogged ducts. But - if you can work through those issues one by one and have an awesome support team behind you, it really does get easier! And once you both have the hang of it, it. is. a. breeze. You can work on your phone while feeding your kid. Or better yet, doze off! There's no worrying about bottles to pack, how many you need, will we run out, etc. As long as mom is there, you're good! 

3. The health benefits are huge. For baby and mama. Babies have less colds and viruses at such a tiny stage in life and also a reduced risk of developing chronic conditions later in life. It reduces the risk of SIDS. For mama, it can mean stronger bones, a huge calorie burn (helping your body return to it's pre-pregnancy size sooner - this is true for some women, not all) and lowers the risk for certain cancers. 

4. You save money. Breastfeeding is FREE!!! And all the budget-loving daddys said "Amen." The cost of formula over the first year can add up to anywhere from $1,000 to $3,000, depending on brand. 

5. It's a great way to lower stress and fend off postpartum depression.

"Motherhood, and specifically breastfeeding - the most central physiological act of mothering during infancy, changes you because it literally alters your brain - structurally, functionally, and in many ways, irreversibly."

While nursing, oxytocin levels increase, which is the hormone responsible for breast milk and is the same chemical released in the brain when a person falls in love. Breastfeeding mamas were seen to release less stress hormones in certain situations.

"The nursing response of the oxytoxin circuits is reinforced by the feeling of pleasure created by bursts of dopamine - the pleasure and reward chemical. Dopamine is jacked up in the mother’s brain by estrogen and oxytocin. The mother’s blood pressure drops, she feels peaceful and relaxed, and she basks in waves of oxytocin-inspired loving feelings for her baby. This neurological mechanism explains one of the ways that breastfeeding reduces the risk of a mom developing postpartum depression"

This is a big deal to me as I did suffer with postpartum depression very badly after my first daughter was born. At the time, I knew nothing about MTHFR, or that I needed to change up my diet and supplements. I feel very confident that nursing has helped make me a calmer, happier mama in light of all the struggles and challenges that first year brings. 

**********

I do remember one day specifically wanting to quit. Krosby was projectile spitting up a LOT and I was over it. And it had only been a few days! I didn't know why it was happening, I was tired (I'm sure) and beyond frustrated. I scanned the formula aisles. Holy crap! That much for one container? I knew in my heart I wanted to keep going. And she stopped spitting up. I needed to change the way I was feeding her for a time, and it worked magically. We did some slight block feeding and that did the trick. It is so super important to have a support system in place and to know WHY you are wanting to breastfeed in the first place. It might seem inconsequential at the time, but during those first early months and as long as you wish to continue, the health and bonding benefits are HUGE! Nursing positively affects a baby's gut health which will play a part in his or her future health many years down the road. 

An antibody found in milk, SIgA, helps set up a healthy intestinal tract environment so that the baby is better equipped to handle environmental problems later on.

“We now recognize more and more that factors in breast milk influence the gut microbiota, which in turn sets up the immune system to have fewer chronic illnesses later in life...” 

These are just some of reasons breastfeeding has become such a priority to me. I dealt with mastitis early on {where I felt like I had the flu / woke up and thought I was dying!} as well as several clogged ducts. For me, I think those both happened as a result of trying to do too much too soon. It hasn't always been fun and without hassle being the sole provider of Krosby's nutrition but as the months have gone on, I wouldn't trade it for the world. I was less worried this time around about schedules and "has it been three hours yet?" I did more on-demand feeding which set me up with an amazing supply and reassured her when she was upset. Even now I can calm her down extremely fast if she is fighting sleep or we're in the midst of teething woes. 

She has not been sick once, other than a tiny cold that required no doctor's visit and we've had zero ear infections. Karlyn began getting ear infections right after we weaned around seven months. That has definitely been one difference this time around that I've observed. Breastfeeding is a commitment, no way around it but I am happy - oh SO happy - to say we are closing in on one year of successful nursing. I don't have a weaning date in mind but will follow her lead as she continues eating more food at meal times. Every baby is different - some wean sooner, some later. And with Winter upon us, I'm in no hurry to shut off such amazing immune support for her little body. The value of breast milk does not diminish with age; rather it becomes more nutritionally concentrated. Super cool!

I'm thankful for our journey to date and know that in the grand scheme, a year is such a short time in her life and in mine. I will always look back on this time with fondness and gratitude for the chance to care for my sweet girl in this way. Motherhood is a gift - though not always easy - and will stretch and challenge us in a number of ways. Feeding our babies, no matter how we choose to do it, is part of mothering and should fill us with thankfulness that we get to play a part.

 

Sources:

http://www.fitpregnancy.com/baby/breastfeeding/20-breastfeeding-benefits-mom-baby

http://www.babycenter.com/0_5-things-you-didnt-know-about-breastfeeding_10357141.bc

http://www.thealphaparent.com/2014/06/how-breastfeeding-changes-your-brain.html

http://phenomena.nationalgeographic.com/2014/02/03/how-breast-milk-engineers-a-babys-gut-and-gut-microbes/

Competing, Weight Gain, and Thoughts on Feeling Thin

On and off over the past ten years or so, I've had the desire to gain some weight. Growing up I was pretty thin and had what I'd call a fast metabolism. I played outside, played high school sports and ate whatever my mom prepared for meals. I do remember my basketball coach telling me the Summer before my freshman year that I had better hit 100 pounds before the season started. He was half-joking I think. I was definitely on the lighter side. 

Somewhere between high school and college I put on some weight and landed at a number I would pretty much stick with the past ten years. The only times my weight has really fluctuated have been during my pregnancies. I've never been at what I would say is an unhealthy weight or body mass because I continued to eat basically however I wanted and I had the energy to exercise and just do life in general. Any health struggles I faced were related to fertility and the MTHFR diagnoses I was given after our second loss.

But it has never been about a number for me. The scale doesn't tell the whole story, nor should it and to base your worth on a number is silly. Yet we often do.

Somewhere during college or soon after I subscribed to Oxygen Magazine. {And actually, I just did a quick search. They still have a site and it looks worth digging around!} I flipped through the pages of those magazines and saw women who were muscular! But still feminine. Some of them competed in body-building or figure type competitions and they ate and trained to be able to do that and I loved it! I thought it was pretty much amazing and a dream started to grow in my heart to do the same. 

Since then I got married, had two babies and 4 miscarriages and spent eight years sitting behind a desk. I obviously continued to work out and delve into a newfound passion for nutrition and life went on. Before I got pregnant with Krosby and while going through ups and downs between all the baby loss, I decided I would compete. I bought a suit, heels, started lifting heavier and with a plan, and even went to one posing class. Thattt was interesting. Talk about newbie. But reality set in and I realized I was NOT ready to be up on stage and I wasn't going to be ready in 16 weeks either.

Fast forward to one miracle pregnancy and my sweet little rainbow babe quickly approaching her first birthday. And it's on my mind again. When we went to Summit this past Summer in Nashville, I learned that Beachbody has their own competition each year called The Classic. Ah! That's perfect, I thought! Fellow coaches told me it was nothing like the real ones and no one would be there to watch, I thought. It would be a great entry into things and I could just see how it goes. 

Last week I met a girl who has done a couple of competitions now and it was so fun talking to her and her husband about it. It got me all jazzed again. My height puts me into the tallest class to compete, class C. And I know that to even have a chance of doing well or just looking like I do, I would have to put on muscle and weight. Which brings me back to my opening line.

It's not that I've thought my weight is unhealthy or that it has been in the past. Like I said, it's pretty much stayed constant for the past ten years and if you know me, you know I like to eat and I like food! So I have dialed in very well the amount I need to eat each day to maintain my weight, and I've done that intuitively. I don't count calories, I don't weigh or measure and I don't obsess over what passes my lips. I have to and choose to eat gluten-free and I do that 100% now due to the MTHFR genetic mutation that affects my health in several different ways. After cutting out gluten, I saw so many amazing improvements (one of those being the ability to keep a pregnancy) that I have never looked back for one moment.

But. It is something I have struggled with - as far as wanting to look different. I feel skinny sometimes and like I wish there was more of me. I have an ectomorph body type, which is small bones, narrow shoulders, and a fast metabolism for starters. I see women who are curvier and I wish I had more mass. I see women with muscles and I want that. I am strong, yes. I can do real push-ups. ha. But I still feel narrow. I feel thin. I have long arms and legs and it is hard for me to put on weight. And there is nothing wrong with that; I've been this way my whole life. It is not something that I need to change or should feel pressure to. I have tried to do it on my own before. And what that comes down to is this:

Conscientiously eating more. Past the point of fullness. Past the point of comfortable. Past where I would normally eat. It means lifting weights and doing resistance training regularly so that my appetite goes up. It means not eating "clean" all the time, something I don't currently do anyways, (or necessarily even believe in), so that I get extra calories in. It means tracking and weighing to make sure I am eating MORE. It means being in a caloric surplus and then structuring my workout progression so the weight(s) go up. I know that in my head - I just haven't done it in the past with any consistency. I've tried; I just haven't stuck with it. #becauselife 

This is getting long and I have a lot more to say. But - it's a start. If you follow me on Instagram {katiiveyfit} you'll start to see more food, more calories, more GAINS hopefully, in the hopes of competing next year. If nothing else, I am aiming for the Classic next July in New Orleans. I'd also love to do a competition locally as well. And I just love something new. A new challenge, something new to take on. And I love transformation. I love that through resistance + food, you can physically change your body. And I want to see if I can do it. I want to SEE growth and heck, I just want bigger shoulders. :-)

I'll be posting more about the methods I'm using and how it's all going on social media - especially Instagram - both my page and story, so if you're there, feel free to follow along. I'll be writing more as well on ectomorph thoughts, hard-gainers, and tips and tricks for adding mass. Especially for females because there's not a lot out there. And what is, is geared towards guys! But don't worry - if you're looking to go the opposite direction, I'll have plenty for you too. I'm excited to start writing more here on something I've become passionate about - FOOD.

If you made it this far, thanks for reading! I'd love to hear your thoughts, struggles, ability to relate or not, or anything else you have to say - below!

10 Months

Krosby. I hope you'll forgive me kid. You haven't had an official monthly update since four months. Anddd that's what happens when you're baby #2 and momma's trying to build a business. So sorry sweetie. We still love ya!

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I can't believe you're ten months old. That blows my mind. It goes by so fast {and yet so slow} all at the same time. The first few months are a blur, aka survival mode. But even as you slip out of that and into "OK, I think we're going to make it" mode, the days still fly by. You are such a joy. The other day I was thinking about our losses and I read a quote that was talking about how through the waiting, the losses, and the heartache, God was just preparing you. He wasn't done with you yet and it wasn't time for you to join our family. He was working on you that whole time and now here you are. Such a blessing.

What's going on with you at 10 Months?!

Stats-

These are 9 month stats. (see above) Height: 27.5 (50%), Weight: 21.9 (90%), Head Size: 17.5 (60%).

Size-

You are a little butterball. And so squishy! You wear a size 5 Honest diaper. You might still be in a 4 but they run small and I sized up. You're wearing 9-12 month clothing and maybe a size 3 shoe? Honestly, you don't wear shoes much/hardly at all. #aintnobodygottimeforthat 

Sleeping-

On a good night you sleep through the night. But we still don't have you going to bed early or at a proper ten month old's bedtime. You're typically in bed around 9:30-10:00ish. Usually a bath beforehand, some pj's, nursing and to bed. Paci + Sound Machine. If you're teething or going through a leap, you'll fight sleep or wake up in the middle of the night. But most nights are solid. I love seeing your face first thing in the morning!

Eating-

You are still nursing like a champ. At your nine month appointment we talked about adding in some regular little meals so I've tried to do that. It's nothing super regimented. Breakfast is hit or miss but I've been giving you a little lunch and dinner each day. 

Foods you've tried: avocado, sweet potato, banana, applesauce, yogurt squeeze, green beans, pinto beans, all kinds of meat {your FAVE!} salmon, blueberries, butternut squash, yellow squash, peas, white potatoes, scrambled egg, banana + egg pancakes, gluten-free french toast (this morning!) Mum-Mum's, yogurt melts, and an oatmeal/quinoa blend.

You're different than your sister. You hate avocado and aren't much of a sweet potato fan. You love meat: deli turkey, roast, chicken, turkey sausage, beef, and salmon. You don't want me spoon feed you; you'd rather do it yourself!

Playing-

You're not much into toys. {Maybe you don't like hand-me-downs?} You'd much rather crawl / walk around the house getting into things. You like to suck on Expo markers and chalk >> Mother of the Year over here. You're happy banging on the Direct TV box and messing up the settings or picking random items up off the floor to see how they taste. You like playing peek-a-boo with daddy and that makes you smile.

Other Things-

You are just a delight kiddo. Hard work, but a delight. YOU ARE WALKING. (gah, how I could forget this in the first draft?!) You started out taking a few steps about a month ago which led to four or five steps and then over the past week you've just taken off. You still crawl half the time.

I love your fluffy hair that keeps on growing and how happy you are to see Karlyn each day. Your little wave is pretty much the cutest thing ever and you can do it on command. We're working on clapping but so far you hit the top of one hand using the other. You don't like being told "No." You like to respond with a "EEeeh!" when you hear it. You have beautiful blue eyes and almost six teeth - two on bottom and three plus one any day now on top; you won't let me look.

You're squirmy during diaper changes and have to be holding some sort of distraction. You've attempted a couple of stairs. You still sleep with Ollie, your big giant mint green paci. Bless that thing. You really don't have any words just yet. For a while you were saying, "Ma ma ma ma ma." I can't wait to hear some soon! Your nicknames include: Kros-BO, Kris-Kross, Mae Mae and Big Girl.

We love you so much sweet girl. Stay little awhile. {You're not allowed to go past 1.}

xo, 

Mom

On Babies...and More.

I feel like I’m going to have another baby. And it’s hard to describe other than just that gut, instinctual feeling. I could be wrong. We could go on to have no more children and raise the two beautiful girls we have now and what a gift. What a huge, miraculous blessing we’ve been given. But throughout my pregnancy and even after I didn’t have the “this is my last” thoughts. You know...

“This is my last time to be 30 weeks pregnant.”

“This is my last time to bathe a newborn.”

I just never did. It’s actually quite interesting (humorous?) to me the amount of time I’ve given this subject considering how long it took us to have our two. And how I was never truly in control of any of it. So it’s funny to me when thoughts cross my brain like, “Hmm, should we have more? When? I am soo not ready right this minute. But if we wait too long…”

I guess those kinds of thoughts are normal but it’s not really up to us to a certain extent. I just have a feeling that we aren’t done. And that {if/when} we get pregnant next time, it might be a boy. OK, OK, I’m done forecasting.

Here’s the thing. Pregnancy is hard. Babies are hard. Raising children is hard. And as a new parent if you can’t look me in the eye and say, this is the gosh-hardest thing I’ve ever done, then I’m just not sure you can be trusted. Kidding. I remember several months ago having this frank discussion. It was sometime in the Spring because Ryan was working Saturdays. We had our small group meeting and I had gotten myself and the girls ready to go. I’m sure I was tired because #newmom. Krosby had blown out of yet another outfit (with baby #3, I’ll get the diaper size thing down!) and we loaded everyone up. We buckled our seat belts up front, looked at each other and said,

“Why did we have a second kid?!”

“I don’t know, but we’re not having anymore!”

Did I mention it’s hard? The lack of sleep, the constant feedings, the complete upheaval of your current day-to-day routine. So why? Why, Why, Why can someone tell me do I look at my nine month old and think, “Oh my goodness. She is so stinkin’ squishy, cute I might die and it really wasn’t THAT bad and look at her. I mean, she’s amazing! Look at them together! Look at me having all my mom stuff together. {Keepin' it PG here.} Maybe we should do this again.

What is that? To quote my friend who will go nameless, “It’s a sickness. A DISEASE!” But don’t be offended. She has three kids herself and is pretty much a rockstar.

Could it be that God sets this desire in our hearts before we even know it?

There’s something about nine months. Maybe you’ve had the entire length of time that sweet child was inside you as she’s now been out and you’re starting to have coherent thoughts. Maybe it’s that in-between stage of not still a newborn - not yet a toddler that has me all googly-eyed and thinking in the quiet spare two minutes of each day, “I mean, if that happened again, it would be OK.”

We went through a lot to bring Krosby into the world. Lots of time, testing, tears and wondering what God was up to. And now to see the redemption in it is simply astounding. As I’ve thought back and forth about it all, a quote I read not long after she was here keeps coming to mind.

It’s by Brene Brown who I desperately want to start reading:

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Wow.

As it turns out, it’s not my story. It’s His. And while I certainly in my limited finite mind, would not have chosen to write certain parts, He did. Who knows what else our story holds? Maybe there will be more losses. Maybe none. Maybe two more babies. Maybe none. But I do know that life has unfolded far better than I could ever have planned, and here’s the thing. It’s not all about me, or our family or what decisions we make. When God gets the ultimate glory and writes our story, we can rest in the knowledge that it’s for our good as well.

And that is something my mama mind can rest in. While I think about more kids.

Inspire YOU

Can I be honest? In a world of female entrepreneurs, it’s not always easy. On a good day, I am confident in who God made me to be and the message I have to to spread that’s all my own. I have a unique voice, my own thoughts and my own personal spin on things that is going to make a difference in someone else’s life.

But then something happens and I lose my vibe. I browse around a fellow girlfriend's page and think, WOWWW. She’s really, really good. What in the world?! How does she have so many followers? How does she DO that?

And that may be a hundred different things. I get sucked into this vortex of HER and instead of coming away inspired, I leave in a funk, sulking, unsure, and unhappy for another person’s success. And ya’ll. That is all on ME!

She didn’t do anything wrong.

In fact, my ill-flavored response flies in the face of what I’ve been reading in my personal development the past few weeks. And I want to share it with you. Because I think jealousy <and let’s just call it what it is here> is something we all struggle with. But here’s the thing.

There is enough to go around. Enough success. Enough income. Enough followers, fans, and friends to be had. Enough paths, enough ideas, and enough of the comparison.

It has to stop!

Her success is not my lack. I have to remind myself of that. It is OK. But when I sit there in that place and stew, when I allow myself to go there and start feeling sorry for myself, or that somehow her accomplishments define and set limits on my own, I’m in a dangerous place.

Let me encourage US with this thought today. You have a God-appointed path to walk. You have the makeup, personal experiences, and quirky quirks that make you, you. And no one can take that away from you. We absolutely can and should draw inspiration from others and learn from their mistakes {and successes!} but true freedom and focus come from staying in our own lane, doing our own best, and being assured that what we plant today in effort, we reap tomorrow in results.

A friend shared that last part, in effect last night and the timing was perfect. My job is to do my best. My job isn’t to look around and feel all jumbled inside because someone else is doing their thing and rocking it. What a distraction from my purpose and poor use of my time. It does nothing but zap me of my zeal. It made me think of what our teachers used to tell us.

“Keep your eyes on your own paper.”

It’s true. It is OK to draw inspiration from someone else. That is how we learn, grow, and improve. We’re not made to do life alone and rely only on ourselves. But it’s that moment when inspiration turns. And I knew it! I could feel that ugliness creeping in and those feelings of disdain and “Ugh, whatever,” as I doubted if what I had was good enough.

Let’s not do that friends. Can we hold each other accountable? Can we find ourselves amazingly talented, uniquely gifted and our talents perfectly portioned for the task at hand?

The next time you find yourself looking out instead of in, remember that YOU have something to offer and only YOU can bring it! So rock it girl. And stay in your lane.

 

The rest will follow.

Kati, Take a Break!

It's amazing to me the things that stick out in my memory. Mostly because I have a terrible one and constantly feel like I can't remember anything.

But I do recall this day quite vividly from college. It was a holiday weekend, maybe the Friday leading up to three days off in a row. I was probably a freshman or sophomore, somewhere in there. I told you - I don't remember things.

But I had decided to go to our school's wellness center and workout. I loved that place! It was really nice and new when I started there and a place I felt comfortable on campus. I was walking back to my dorm after finishing up and ran into a couple of people...I don't even know that I'd call them friends necessarily since it took me a while to make them but I do know what was said. I'm sure the conversation went something like this.

"Hey, how's it going? What are you doing?"

Me: "Oh, just getting a workout in."

<Look of confusion>

"Kati, it's the holiday weekend. Take a break!"

It probably shouldn't have been that big of a deal. And it's not like I walked away crying. But I distinctly remember feeling embarrassed, weird, like an oddball. Silly for going to the gym, when probably no one else was there.

It was the weekend. Why couldn't I just be normal??

Even now, it stirs up feelings inside me. Because I entered that time of my life extremely shy, naive, and like most college kids, unsure of what I wanted to do in life and where it was all going. All I knew was that I enjoyed staying FIT.

Every time I walked into my advisor's office, he'd say, "Kati, have you decided what you want do?" And I'd say, "Yes, remember? (well, once I had decided) I'm going to do Exercise Sports Science. And be a personal trainer."

He never made me feel odd about that; he was head of the department. But despite his involvement and participation in my life goals, I still felt a twinge of uncertainty when I recalled that silly little conversation where one off-the-cuff comment made me question it all.

Did I really need to care so much? Was being into health and fitness silly? 

I can get emotional thinking about it because that is where it started for me. I had enjoyed playing high school sports but I knew I didn't want to coach those same sports or teach PE like a lot of others pursuing my same degree. I hated math. And the only subjects I liked were English and my ESS classes. I became more interested in nutrition. I didn't feel a draw towards anything else, so I went with what I knew and what I liked. 

Fast-forward. I tried personal training in a gym environment but it wasn't my thing. I didn't know what my thing was but for ten years, I tried to find it. I looked and searched and prayed and was bored and frustrated and thought - what is there for me? What is out there in the field I'm so passionate about that would allow me to do what I love?

I never guessed I would find it. But I'm so glad I did. And that story is for another day, but let me tie this all together with a thought. 

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It's true! And had I let that off-handed comment throw me off the path I felt led to pursue, who knows how different my life might now look? If you feel passionate about something, if you feel called and led to DO what you do, then do it! Don't let another person, thing, excuse, or obstacle stand in your way. Find your way through - fight for your passion - and don't stop until you've reached your goal. If that takes your whole life, bravo! You will live a life well spent. Your heart will beat faster, your smile shown more often, and others around you will feel the energy that comes from doing what you LOVE.

Happy Weekend my friends. #DontStopBelieving

Day 1. Post 1. Welcome!

Well, hello! And Happy September!

Wait.

How did that happen? Didn't we just have Christmas? Wasn't I just sitting in the hospital bed holding my sweet, sweet baby girl?

Where did the time go? :-0 

I mean, I'm ALL for cooler temps and less sweating in general, but why does each passing year of my life go by so. stinking. fast? I don't understand it. Unless it's this thing they call getting older. eek.

But I digress. I'm happy you're here! I'm happy I'M here. It may not seem {or look} like much, but this little space has been stuck up in my head for quite a while now. However, a new baby, a new business, and lots and LOTS of laundry have kept me from it.

<<Why does the second child increase laundry ten-fold??>>

The Lord must have wanted me to finally pull it together today though as my motivation kicked into high gear and the baby napped for-evah.

I'm excited. If you've followed my/our story, you know I've been blogging for years off and on {@ theiveyleague.blogspot.com}, but I felt it was time for a new space. A new look. Because let's face it - my life does not look the same as it did five years ago!

I can't wait to tell you more. I can't wait to pour my heart out. I don't have a fancy camera. Most days I'm snapping pics of our fam with my iPhone so there will be some pictures - but mostly I wanted to write. I have so many things that pop into my head to talk about and things that keep popping up that I know i'm being prompted to share. But you know how it goes. Life is cray! Always.

I thought about putting this off and waiting to hit publish until I have new head shots, a logo, more fancy smanch. But that's been just my problem. I keep waiting and waiting and in the meantime, the itch to write isn't going away.

This space will evolve! And so will I.

I spent time on numerous "live chats" today figuring out logistics (thank you tech-y people!) and this is where I landed. I'm excited {did I already say that?} to see it unfold. And I hope you'll go with me on this journey. 

I'm just a Wife, Mom, and Health and Fitness Fan. I double-dip in the PB jar and a hot Epsom salt bath to end the day is my jam. Throw in a snack and...bliss.

It's a new month! New look. And a brand new name. Welcome!

katiivey.com